Bedtime routines, night waking & winding down
If bedtime is a battle in your house, you are not alone and you are not doing it wrong. As many as 80% of autistic kids have trouble with sleep — falling asleep, waking in the night, or waking way too early. And when sleep is off, everything else gets harder. For them and for you. The first things to try are routine and environment, not medicine. Start with the cards below and change one thing at a time.
Same steps. Same order. Every night. Keep it short — 20 to 30 minutes — and calm: bath, pajamas, teeth, a book, lights out. Start it at the same time each night, and wake them at the same time each morning, weekends too. Put the steps in pictures so they can see what comes next — Bloom can make you a visual schedule in Harvest. And here's the part families miss: everyone who does bedtime does it the same way. Mom, dad, grandma, the sitter. Same routine.
The hour before bed sets up the whole night. Screens off — no tablets, video games, or exciting shows. Lights down. No caffeine in the 3 to 4 hours before bedtime, and that means soda, iced tea and chocolate too. Quiet music or a book instead. Keep the bedroom dark, quiet and comfortable, and keep the bed for sleep, not screens.
For a lot of autistic kids, the problem isn't being tired — it's how the bed feels. Soft, familiar pajamas. Tags cut out. Sheets they like the feel of. If small sounds wake them, a steady fan or white noise can cover them. Weighted blankets are popular, but talk to your child's OT or doctor before you try one. They are never safe for babies, and young children have died after getting trapped inside one.
When they wake up at 2am, the goal is to make the middle of the night the most boring time of day. Go in quietly. Keep the lights low and your words few. Walk them back to bed the same way every time. No screens, no snacks, no starting the day. It will feel like it isn't working. Consistency is what makes it work, and it takes more than a few nights.
If your child is up for the day at 4 or 5am, treat everything before your chosen wake-up time like the middle of the night: quiet, lights low, back to bed, no screens or snacks. Pick one wake-up time and keep it the same every day, weekends too. If you need to move the whole schedule, sleep doctors say to go slowly: shift bedtime and wake-up time by about 15 minutes a day until you get there. And if early waking keeps going even with a steady routine, tell your pediatrician.
Visit the link →Some kids don't just wake up — they get up and go. If your child leaves their room or tries to leave the house at night, safety comes first. Door and window alarms so you hear them. Locks placed high, out of reach. Know your plan before you need it. The Safety & Crisis guide has the full plan.
Melatonin is sold as a supplement, so it isn't checked like medicine — one study found bottles holding less than half, or more than four times, the amount on the label. Sleep doctors' own advice is to try routine and habit changes first. Please don't start melatonin, or any sleep aid, without your child's doctor. They decide whether it fits your child and how much. And if you have it at home, keep it put away like medicine — gummies look like candy.
Visit the link →Tell your pediatrician if your child snores most nights, has pauses in their breathing, gasps or chokes in their sleep, breathes through their mouth, or sleeps very restlessly. These can be signs of sleep apnea, which can be treated — and it can show up in the daytime as irritability, trouble focusing or hyperactivity. Call 911 right away if their breathing stops for more than 20 seconds or their skin turns pale, bluish or gray. And if something about their sleep just worries you, trust that and ask.
Visit the link →You can't run on empty forever. If you have a partner, take turns — one of you covers the night, the other sleeps, then switch. Ask family for a night off when you can. Look into respite care; it's on the Funding page. A rested parent handles 2am better. That isn't selfish. That's part of the plan.
Bloom learns your child from what you share, then answers your hardest questions for them — not with generic advice.
Talk to Bloom about Sleep →